A Novel Message – The Coronavirus Speaks Out

By Bill Oakey – May 7, 2020

I just overheard a private conversation that I wasn’t supposed to hear. But since I did, you need to hear it too. And share it. This virus is not really a silent enemy. The little spikey things communicate with each other. We’re not supposed to hear it, but somehow I caught this conversation:

“If the latest news reports are true, we can beat these humans. They’re not very smart.”

“Well, what makes you so sure?”

“OK, Let’s start from the beginning. They have no idea where we really came from or when we infected the first person.”

“Do they still think we started in a Chinese lab?”

“Most of them don’t, but that doesn’t really matter. Our biggest advantage is how easily we traveled around this planet in the beginning. And, get this! They’re not taking serious measures to prevent the easy traveling environment that helped us spread in the first place.”

“You’re so right! We got to America by plane. If we inhabit the body of just one passenger, we get the freedom to spread in a closed cabin for up to 4 or 5 hours on a single flight. But planes are mostly empty now. Won’t they have tough regulations when the passengers come back?”

“Not hardly. There was talk of keeping the middle seats empty and requiring masks. But there are no mandated government regulations. Only phrases like “recommended,” “You might want to consider,” etc. It’s a joke! And, lucky for us, the aisle seats are a lot closer than 6 feet from the window seats anyway.”

“Wow, so we’ll get to spread almost as easily as we did last winter. Some of the masks might help them, but those aren’t regulated either. They can be made out of any old hokey thin cloth, decorated with flowers.”

“Well, I have one other airline question. What about those older humans? And the ones with vulnerable medical conditions. Won’t they be isolated in a separate, protected area of the plane?”

“I’ve read a lot of their news stories, and nobody’s mentioned it. They might ask people if they’ve been sick or even take some of their temperatures. But we can spread from someone who doesn’t even know they’re infected.”

“About the masks. Don’t they have companies mass-producing millions of masks that are certified for the best possible protection, at affordable prices for the general public?”

“Nope. There are no standards at all for consumer-grade masks, and many states have decalared wearing masks optional. And only a portion of the medical supplies are purchased in bulk at the Federal level. The states have to bid against each other for tons of it.

“What about this reopening of restaurants, hair salons, beaches and all the rest?”

“The humans should have read their own history. They could just Google ‘San Francisco 1918 pandemic.’ After their world war ended, San Francisco held a big celebration in the streets. They took off their masks and threw them in the air, and danced like crazy. They opened their businesses way too soon. The flu came back with a huge spike and killed a lot of people. I heard that San Francisco’s current mayor is not going to let us get that same advantage. But plenty of other cities are willing to let us start spreading again.”

“Well, hey, I think we should terminate this conversation immediately.”

“Why is that?”

“We forgot to activate our communication suppressors. One of those humans might be listening.”

“OK. Are you and I still on for this afternoon?”

“Sure thing, buddy. See you at the beach!”

Musical Accompaniment for This Blog Piece:

  1. From a Distance – By Nanci Griffith, 1987, original version. Or Bette Midler, 1990
  2. Don’t Stand So Close to Me – The Police, 1980
  3. Behind the Mask – Fleetwood Mac, 1990
  4. A Year’s Worth of Distance – Kenny Loggins, 2007
  5. Keep Away From Me – Graham Nash, 1986
  6. Drop the Mask – Diana Ross, 1999
  7. Keeping My Distance – Martina McBride, 1997
  8. Mask Upon My Face – Jeff Bridges, 2000
  9. Don’t It Make You Want to Go Home – Joe South, 1969
  10. All By Myself – Nancy Sinatra

Lyrics to “Behind the Mask” by Fleetwood Mac – Written By Christine McVie

Don’t you come too close to me
You’re dangerous, can’t you see?
You can make the darkness mean more
Than it ever did, ever did before
(It’s a Devil’s disguise)
Angel in black
And I recognize the face behind the mask
(It’s a Devil’s disguise)
Angel in black
I don’t know if I want you back
You’re the cool nights of the desert
And the hot kisses of the sun
Why is it that I don’t believe you
When you say I’m the only one?
I know I’m the lonely one
(It’s a Devil’s disguise)
Angel in black
And I recognize the shadows from your past
(It’s a Devil’s disguise)
Angel in black
Don’t you know it’ll never last
The face behind the mask
There will never be a second chance for you
Oh no, not for you
(It’s a Devil’s disguise)
Angel in black and I recognize
The face behind the mask
(It’s a Devil’s disguise)
Angel in black
Don’t you know it’ll never last
The face behind the mask
(It’s a Devil’s disguise)
Angel in black and I recognize
The shadows from your past
(It’s a Devil’s disguise)
Angel in black
I don’t know if I want you back
I don’t know if I want you back
Don’t you know it’ll never last
The face behind the mask

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